So now, you’ve said your peace. You’ve figured out what you wanted to change. You’ve had your conversation. Then what?
Walk away. Leave the scene. Go about your business. Do what you would normally do and be the happy person you are. Share your thoughts and reflect on the experience with one of your trusted friends. But don’t harp on it.
The person is going to do one of three things: nothing, do like you’ve asked, or continue on with their current behaviors. But what are you going to do? Focus on your life and doing what it takes to get closer to your goals and dreams. Stopping to reflect on that person over and over is not helping you to get where you want to be.
Concentrate on filling your life, your conversations, and your energy towards the positive things in your life. Yes, I know I’m suggesting the impossible in some situations. There are times when the other person is your children’s parent, a co-worker, or someone else that you see on a frequent basis.
The more you can focus on the positive things in your life and reaching towards your goals, the less the other situation will crowd into and take over your life. While they still may be there, don’t allow them to be the topic of every conversation and your every thought. Give yourself an allotted time each week to share and vent about this situation. This will help you to stay focused on the positive.
By reducing the amount of time and energy that you spend worrying about the bully in your life, the less power they have over you. The more you focus on other things- the less you focus on them. Fill your life with the things that matter to you, and even if their presence is still there, it will have a smaller effect on you. Eventually, they will give up.
“You’ve done it before and you can do it now. See the positive possibilities. Redirect the substantial energy of your frustration and turn it into positive, effective, unstoppable determination.” Ralph Marston